I am so..... I don't even know the word.  

I feel like there have been people in my house all weekend, and I'm loosing my mind.  I was gone until 3 yesterday, and at 5 my roomate and other people started arriving.  They stayed until 11... one other adult, and 6 kids/teens.  They were supposed to be done by 7, so that's what I'd planned on.  Instead I spent 6 hours entertaining someone else's company.  Listening to my roomate rant at teenagers who had came to help her make goodie bags for kids at church.  Nothing they did was good enough.  They were stupid.  It hurt me to even LISTEN to here, and then I looked at one of them and his head was down, his shoulders slumped... my heart broke. 

I went to church this morning, then to see dad at the nursing home.  Took the scenic route home and took lots of pictures.  Got home at 3:15, washed green onions and celery and got them all ready to cut.  Washed the cutting board, had it sitting out on the computer desk (the kitchen table is NOT comfy at all for a short person... the chairs are too low or something, I have trouble slicing stuff when I sit in there.), and everything was ready to start slicing them for the dressing my roomate wanted so bad.    3:30 they get here.  Yes, you read that right.  My roomate invited her neice and nephew over, didn't even bother to call and let me know.  Asked me (but you know how people ask but don't ask?) if her neice could use the computer... the neice had asked me just a few minutes before, and I'd asked if she could wait until I had the stuff sliced... I tried to explain, but the roomate was already offended.  Which, it is her computer, so she had the right to ask for them to get on it.  But come on, could you at least ask why I'd asked the niece to wait? So, I sliced the stupid things on the table, standing up, hunched over... then went out to work with my plants for an hour until time to get ready for church. 

I'm so angry... I went to church tonight and could barely hold in the tears.  But eventually I did... came home, was nice to the company (Yes, they were still here at 8 when I got home, stayed until 9:30) and commented to the roomate that I'd be a lot easier for me to handle their presence if she could let me know beforehand that they were coming (we've had this same conversation before).  I even apologized, though I'm not sure what for.  She said she was sorry for not calling.  She lied.  She isn't sorry. 

Now my "long weekend" is over, and I'm FAR more stressed than I was at the beginning.  I didn't get laundry done, I didn't have any chance to get even half of the plants I bought planted, (there were only 12 little flower plants total!) and my room got messier instead of cleaner.  And our house is absolutely trashed now.  The sink is piled with their dishes. 

And I have PMS to top it all off.  And I feel totally alone, and I have no real live person to tell who would give a rip. 

So yeah, I need a hug.   

This week for Sunday Scribblings, the writing prompt was: Real Life

So I decided to give you some glimpses into what MY "real life" is like.

Real life is me, in my garden, with my hair up in a loose crazy-looking ponytail creation of some kind.  My hands are covered in dirt, because I absolutely HATE gloves.  There are handprints across my butt from where I've wiped my hands, and my knees are dirty from bending down to reach the plants. And I love every bit of the dirt.

Real life is me, propped up by pillows on my bed, surrounded by art supplies, yarn, and good books.  Relaxing music is playing, usually ocean sounds and classical music, and I am at peace.

Real life is me, raising my hands, talking to a God I believe in wholeheartedly.  Sometimes I weep, sometimes I laugh, sometimes I just talk a while.  Soon the things of life start to pull at me, and I realize I have to leave him.  But as I start to move on and do other tasks, I notice something. I feel filled.

Real life is me, holding a small hand, walking in the woods.  The rains from the past few days have flooded the State park, making what was once a gentle stream rush forcefully over the rocks.  I sit down on the top of the rocks, he sits on my lap.  I push off, and down we go!  The water has made the rocks into a perfect waterslide! We reach the bottom, and my backside is soaked, cold, and dirty.  He looks up at me all excited, "can we do it AGAIN?!"  My heart melts.

Real life is me, sitting in my local yarn store.  It's open knitting night, and I have never been before.  I am tense at first, but as we chat, I relax.  We gab about this and that, politics, work, love,... and I quietly settle back in my chair.  I feel at home.

Real life is me, on a Saturday morning.  The roomate is gone, the house is quiet, and I am ENERGIZED! I throw on my "cleaning clothes" (you know the ones, kinda stained, kinda "hole-y"?).  I throw my hair in a braid, and put on a bandana just because I can.  I turn up music as loud as I possibly can, open up the doors to let fresh air in, and set to work.  I clean and clean, singing loudly and off-key as I do it. I enjoy the smell of the cleaning supplies that fills the house.  And when it's all said and done, I collapse down in exhaustion and play a game on my computer, loving my nice clean house.  I feel accomplished.

Real life is me, hiking with my cousins.  We find a section of rocks, and of course we have to climb! We go up the hillsides, hanging onto small trees when we can. We find strange bugs, and admire the view from the top.  We find a small hollowed out space in one of the giant rocks.  We squeeze in, and dream.  We think about the lives of the Indians who once roamed this woods.  Did they hide there from the rain?  Did they pretend it was a house?  What were their lives like?  I look around me and see the beauty of nature, and the warmth of family.  I feel whole.

Here is my dilema:

This is one part of my yard.  Inside the bricks is a patch of poppies.  (Are you having Wizard of Oz flashbacks yet? LOL)

Now, here is my challenge.  I don't want this ENTIRE flowerbed to be only poppies.  It's like 8 feet long or so, probably 3 feet wide.   What would you all suggest I put in there?  I can put things in front, behind, or beside the poppies.   The bed gets partial sun/partial shade, it has nice mulch on top... the ground seems perfect for growing stuff. 

Any ideas???

Wind Warning by Duane Ackerson

The wind blows the faces off the statues in the park
and leaves the faces of heroes on custard pies
in the cafe across the street.
The wind turns the faces of pedestrians
slightly askew;
the wind sends the words askew
and, even inside, messages sneak out the door
before they reach any ears.
The wind wipes the fingerprints off our hands
and everything we touch:
no man, no woman here in the wind owns anything.
And now:
the wind tugs at these words on the paper:
by the time you read this poem
it may not be
here.

I really like that poem... found it today while surfing for poetry online. 

I also have one I wrote that's online at G's site here.  For Contagious Creativity, we were asked to "use a piece of art as an inspiration for poetry."  It was really interesting because she assigned that right after G & I had joined forces, and Sunday he posted my poem with his photography!

Just an opinion question for you all today...

What ways have you all tried to keep your mind more concious of God throughout the days? 

Or if you don't believe in a "God" per se, what have you tried to keep yourself more aware of spiritual things throughout your days?

Colossians 3:2  Set your affections on things above, not on things on the earth.

Last night I went to my FIRST night of knitting classes!!!

I had everything planned... go home from work at 4:30, eat, leave my house at 5:15, dash to cash my check, and then get to the knitting class nice and early.

I got there 5 minutes late.  *sigh*  Lots of reasons why, all little things that just mounted up.   So, I was already frustrated.

I go in, and there are two other ladies in my class.  Both are much older, one has grandkids and the other has a child in college.  They're both really nice, and so is the lady teaching the class.  I pick out some yarn (light blue! Very cute.) and we start to work. 

I discover that I suck. 

Yeah.  Badly.  I don't hold the needles right, I was knitting backwords stitches AND I hold my yarn with my left hand, which is fine, but everyone else does it using their right hand.  Altogether I just had all kinds of trouble and felt like going home and crying. 

But... I stayed in the class and kept working at it.  By the end, I'd corrected my stitches, was holding my needles at the right angles, and had learned the garter stictch, casting on using a different method than what I'd learned, and how to bind off at the end!!!!! GROOVY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, I went home last night and worked a little on holding my yarn with my right hand.  I figure the class will be MUCH easier for me if I learn to do things the way everyone else does.  Then when it's over, I can always go back to holding the yarn with my left hand :) 

Althogether, I had a nice time... I look forward to next week!   And they ALL drink diet beverages!!!!! Woo hoo!!!! 

That has to be a sign!! 

You know, I'm not normally a dreamer... but lately I've actually been dreaming.

Last night I dreamed about one of my friends from high school.  I dreamed that she'd somehow lost her hearing (actually, that she'd always been deaf? We just somehow didn't notice in school? LOL)  We were walking and talking, and of course everything I said she misunderstood.   I don't remember what I said to her at the end, but two of my other friends from high school came up to me, and were SO upset.  Whatever I'd said to the first friend had really upset her, and my other friends were so mad at me for it.  But even in the dream, I couldn't figure out what I'd said to upset her.

The dream is still in my mind, really bothering me for some reason. I don't understand it...  

Another dream I had a while back was similar... my dad and grandma were SO disappointed.  No idea why.  *sigh*  I woke up and cried. 

So, strange things happening in my dreams... they make me wonder what's up?  Do I need to deal with some issues about "unpleaseable" people in my life?  With my fear or rejection? 

Or do I just need to stop eating Mexican food so close to bedtime?  LOL

I was looking around at the Other Jana's site today, and noticed that she'd added a new feature to her blog!!! So, of course, since everyone wants to be like us Jana's, I had to follow her example!

So, if you look on the left side of my blog, you'll see a link to "View my FAQ"  Click on that, and you can find out a little about me.  You can also ASK QUESTIONS, and please please do because I had no idea what to write there!!! LOL

You know, it's really hard to find something that goes with the word "Tuesday" LOL

I am OFFICIALLY in the Basic Knitting class! I got an e-mail from my new fearless leader this morning, saying that it's not too late to join!  So, here I go on a new adventure! We'll see how it turns out, but right now I'm REALLY excited!

As of right now, it has been 35 and a half hours since my last drink of a Diet beverage.  I'm not sure how I feel about that... LOL but yesterday I hate reece cups, so I guess that doesn't really count as 35 hours w/o caffine!  And today won't count either, cause I bought a pack of THREE, and one is still in my drawer.  :o) 

I bought fancy vitamins yesterday (not the oils... which BTW Shine, I will NOT have any chance of burping up fish because I WILL NOT be putting any type of fish oil into my body.  Nope.  Fishies don't swim in this tummy!  They make a nice oil from FLAX, and I praise God for it hahahahaha).  Anyway... back to the vitamins! They are actually liquid, cherry flavor, and the lady said they taste kinda like beer.  You can take them alone or in water... I am pretty sure mine will be in water!!! I'll let you all know how they work!

My puter at home has crashed... it boots up, starts to load windows, and then restarts itself!  This has happened to me before but I can't for the life of me remember what was wrong or how I fixed it!  Guess I'll just be ranting and raving at it for the next few days until I find the answer.  *sigh*

That's all the important news I can think of at the moment... I'll go bloghop while I eat my last Reecie cup!!!!!

I stopped at the health food store tonight in between jobs, and after buying some vitamins, we got to talking about other vitamins that really help out the human body.  She told me about Omega-3 and the studies they've done on it... how it's been shown to help fight cancer, diabetes, and arthritis.

Have any of you ever tried these?  Did they help you?  Any particular things to watch out for or avoid with taking them?